themostepotente: (LuciusFuck)
[personal profile] themostepotente
How many times have you been reading a fic and you're really into it 'n shit and all like -- Yes, yes, YES...NO! Did the writer really just give Snape a 12 inch cock?

A 12 INCH COCK? Halt. Backspace. Put a fork in me, I'm done.

Oh, yes, because offline I've just run into sooo many guys with enormous schlongs. Okay, I understand fanfiction is supposed to have an element of fantasy, but COME THE FUCK ON.

The biggest cock I saw in front of my face (and not at the gay male strip club :P) was about 8 inches. Um, 8 inches is pretty damn big, folks. I cannot fathom what 12 inches up the ass would feel like. The likelihood of it even 'fitting'...

By the same token, I was equally turned off by an author who gave Harry a FOUR inch prick. FOUR? FOUR? Golf anyone? *facepalm*

How could you do that to Harry, man? Okay, now Draco is fair game.

So to all of you writers that mention cock size -- what's reasonable? What's unreasonable?

Who do you give bigger wangs to? Smaller ones?

The average cock size is 4-6 inches. I usually stick between 6-8 inches. And well, since Snape is ugly, dammit, he deserves a bigger cock.

Love to hear from everyone -- especially the guys!

--P

Date: 2004-07-08 08:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] flimpy.livejournal.com
AHAHAHAHAHA! I didn't catch that bit o' textual hiccup until others pointed it out, so we're on the same brain wave.

Oh and [livejournal.com profile] themostpotente? Along with the Summary Executions, this is the most amusing thing I've read all week :))

Date: 2004-07-09 06:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dementedsiren.livejournal.com
Obviously, some twisted part of us thinks a 12-foot cock is normal.

The FIC! The FIC has taken over my brain! It demands 12 feet to be satisfied and I must comply!

I'm giggling like mad right now.

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