Sorry, guys...

[themostepotente]

I haven't spoken about my mother's death since last April.

Her estate was finalised this week. My sister sent me a check today. I feel very undeserving of this money even though I have a house I need to maintain. Credit cards I can finally pay off and be rid of. Fuck, even my motorcycle loan.

I should feel elated by all of this, really. Triumphant even.

I don't. It just depresses the shit out of me.

This past year has made me a very different person.

And now there's no going back.

***

I am going to try and get some recs out tonight even though my head is pounding.

--P

Comments

[frantic-mice.livejournal.com]

My dear. Of course nothing I say can make any of this better. It doesn't get better with words.

I think she would be happy about how you live your life, that she eliminated some of your problems and that you give other people a lot of happiness and joy.

Thinking of you my dear Raphael. ♥

*hugs*

[saladbats.livejournal.com]

*sending you much love*

[pinkdormouse.livejournal.com]

HUGS HUGS

[cornmouse.livejournal.com]

I am just popping in to say that I completely understand what you're feeling right now. My daddy passed away on the 18th of this month and I can tell right now that I'll never be the same. I'm glad that the estate is settled and all is done, but I"m sorry that she's gone. It's a mixed bag. Anywho, I didn't know you when she passed so forgive my lateness when I say how sorry I am for your loss.