Fandom Discussion -- Online Safety

[themostepotente]

This is going to be radically different, I think, from anything I post here.

Some of you may have noticed I have a stalker. This clown I don't perceive as a threat, but there are a lot of scary people out there that would take sending an IM a step further.

Nobody should have to live in fear. Nobody should have to feel like they need to keep their identity hidden to feel safe. It should be a choice 'not' a requirement.

This isn't just about fandom, folks -- this is about keeping safe, so I'm opening up a discussion and encouraging those in fandom to speak up or out, whichever :-)

How much information about yourself is too much to share? When is it okay to trust?

If you have any advice about keeping safe, please come and share it.

If you have a story to tell about being stalked, please, come and share that too.

The holidays are upon us, and some people are especially vulnerable this time of year. And yeah, I know this kinda sounds like a public service announcement, but somebody's advice might save another's life.

Thank you,

--Penny

Comments

[libitina]

I grew up playing on the internet. First rule I learned was that you never ever ever give out your real name. Also, you don't tell people where you live or where you go to school.

I have broken all these rules. Even back then. I didn't drive, so I met a couple people by having them come to my house and pick me up... I usually, however, tried to meet them outside the house so they didn't see the inside... though that might have been because I didn't want them to meet my parents.

I had one guy who stalked me who lived less than a mile away... I didn't worry much because he had epilepsy and couldn't drive... but my first day of college, I found him standing outside my dorm! That taught me not to dismiss people's abilities.

I told a few people my real name, but only when I was doing something where my name would be obvious. There's a whole slew of people I have met and had relations whith and all who only know me by my pseudonym.

Recently, however, my real life and my fandom life has been overlapping. I have been going to dinner parties and conventions and stuff... and it's been seeming silly to keep using a pseudonym with people I know and trust... but now that I have started using my real name some of the time, I have become quite careless. So it's something I am stuggling with a bit now, too.