What was your WORST sexual experience?

So...

All of this talk and ficcing about really bad sex got me thinking. Share your WORST sexual experience here.

I've enabled anonymous posting if anyone's feeling shy.

IP logging is off, baby.

Time to let loose like Mother Goose, people.

--P

Here's mine:

I dated this Japanese guy years ago. He was incredibly gorgeous, but he was undoubtedly the shittiest lay I've ever had. His cock was maybe between 4-5 inches long (4-6 inches in length is average in case you're wondering), which is A LOT smaller than I care for. Granted, I don't need a 10 inch cock ramming me in the ovaries, but I like to feel something. Where's the fun in not knowing it's inside? :P

To cut a long and admittedly TMI story short, I had to fake. Now, I've never had cause to do so before or after this experience but fuck, sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to alleviate the boredom. I won't even get into his oral issues. Bound editions there. Or the fact that he BITCHED about wearing condoms.

WORST. SEX. EVER.

My love for the Lizard knows no bounds!

The wonderfully talented lizardspots has illustrated my Ron/Viktor fic Between a Cock and a Hard Place!

It's called 'Vultures and Weasels' and it can be found

Here!

*pushes tarie over there*

Yay for spreading the Viktor love!

I Meme Mine

Yeah, I'm in a Beatles mood. It could be that I've been quietly plugging away on my Harry/Draco/Beatles crackfic for carbonised.

I was going to do a fandom discussion tonight, but I think I'm going to wait a bit until after the book's out. I fully expect fandom to come to a halt while we all devour HBP. I promise it's a good discussion though. *G*

FTR -- I'm thoroughly enjoying everyone's responses to my latest post. You're a wild and crazy bunch of friends I have, and I love you all for being uniquely you.

So meme, yeah, here we go...

Five people on LJ I'd sleep with that I haven't slept with already -- or sumthin' like that. Gacked from rosesanguina.

1.) sinick

Sin is the Snape to my Black. And the Snape to my Regulus. And the only one I'll allow to make fun of my $10 words. I'd love to cosplay and have delicious hate sex with her. Although, it would be interesting to both dress up as Lucius and have sex with myself :P That probably made no sense. Hands down, sexiest gal on LJ. *growls at rosesanguina* Back off beeeotch! MINE! *G*

2.) underlucius

Simply stated, I'd like to fuck the 'shy' out of her.

3.) pen_and_umbra

P & U makes me squee like a squeeing thing. Her sense of humor is not only endearing but very HOT to me.

4.) fiendling

But only if we could have Michael Jackson as mood music. Baby, I think I my bacon chaps are back from the cleaner's :P

5.) calixta9

Cali's my girl. I think she needs me to corrupt her. A few crotch piercings would do the trick nicely. *G*

--P

Tagging, tagging, who am I tagging?

bookofjude, scela_letifer, ariadneelda, ac1d6urn, and silentauror.