I 'met' my stalker via a small, private mailing list. I never thought about not sharing info with 'friends'. On this mailing list, if someone was ill, we would send get well cards. I, as listowner, would send the card with everyone's get well wishes. Everyone who got ill, had a birthday, marriage, whatever, got a card from the list. However, this indicated to Stalker!Girl that I loved her. I didn't have a clue first. I had given her (and others) my phone number. My mailing address. My birthday. So on and so forth.
At first, she was just friendly. Then it intensified, and I explained, no, I'm sorry, not interested. She didn't stop.
When I stopped replying to her emails, she would send me messages saying, "I see what you're doing. I see you posting, I know you are there."
When I stopped taking her phone calls, she would call my house 14 times in an hour.
It got to the point where I would not speak to *anyone* online unless they were in my circle of trusted (I had met them in RL) friends. She finally went away (btw, this went on for around five years) because she 'fell in love' with someone else.
In that time, I moved (and all my mail is sent to a p.o. box). I no longer have a landline phone (she got my home address from a reverse directory online).
I stopped posting to my mailing lists. I stopped writing. I stopped making friends. Because of this situation (there's a lot more, but I just try not to think about it all), I have had bigtime issues when someone makes overtures towards me - I *am* getting better. I used to think anytime anyone made friendly contact with me that they 'might' be a stalker. But now I don't automatically think that, thank god. :) I don't want to live like that. But I won't ever give out my home address (only four people in the world have it and they are as close to me as can be) and most people do not know the name I was born with (which I don't use much anyway).
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
Stalked
Date: 2004-11-28 01:40 pm (UTC)At first, she was just friendly. Then it intensified, and I explained, no, I'm sorry, not interested. She didn't stop.
When I stopped replying to her emails, she would send me messages saying, "I see what you're doing. I see you posting, I know you are there."
When I stopped taking her phone calls, she would call my house 14 times in an hour.
It got to the point where I would not speak to *anyone* online unless they were in my circle of trusted (I had met them in RL) friends. She finally went away (btw, this went on for around five years) because she 'fell in love' with someone else.
In that time, I moved (and all my mail is sent to a p.o. box). I no longer have a landline phone (she got my home address from a reverse directory online).
I stopped posting to my mailing lists. I stopped writing. I stopped making friends. Because of this situation (there's a lot more, but I just try not to think about it all), I have had bigtime issues when someone makes overtures towards me - I *am* getting better. I used to think anytime anyone made friendly contact with me that they 'might' be a stalker. But now I don't automatically think that, thank god. :) I don't want to live like that. But I won't ever give out my home address (only four people in the world have it and they are as close to me as can be) and most people do not know the name I was born with (which I don't use much anyway).